Its true, as a 9 year old girl we have scrapbooks, role play and outfits ready or the big day... that being our wedding day.

Prince Charming is supposed to come around among the years of approx. 18-24, anything past this? Worrying.

Why is it, as a society, we all put this pressure on a female?

If it's not her ticking body clock, it's her left hand, second finger in... empty, that defines her.

But is 2021! surely we have changed our standards, our expectations and views... or have we?

You know who really loads the pressure? not our friendship circle, not our parents, or auntie indirectly labelling us as the modern day Bridget Jones, but ourselves.

I have had the conversation with most of my closest friends, clients and most of all my mum.

my parents met at school, at the age of 14 and have been inseparable since, to say this is an amazing example of true love is an understatement.

However it also caused an unrealistic expectation for it to happen just the same for me, and when it didn't I thought, college it will happen then, when I turn 18 and start hitting the town ill meet him.

It just didn't pan out that way, plenty of attention but no perfect match.

I've always heard, career or family. still in this day and age is a Woman supposed to choose- there are plenty of obstacles making it this way too (childcare cost and government lack of support to name two!)

I used to love nothing more than flicking through magazines as a teenager, still do now as a 30 year old, but the little answer a/b/c/d quiz' would always categorise us into 'Female Boss', 'Party Girl, 'Forever Friend' & 'Superstar'...

But I just don't get it, why can't we be it all?

I WANT to be an independent female, who excels in her career but meets her significant partner in life, is wed with a loving family and try and keep a firm balance of all of the above. doable in my opinion.

Does a wedding band really define us?

Does a CEO sign on our desk really complete us?

Does "full time mummy" on our instagram bio really heal the insecurity and want one has for more?

I am absolutely not discrediting any of the above, in fact achieving any of them should bring joy and fulfilment to any woman.

But there is more to life, and we need to teach ourselves as well as the next generation that there is no rule book, no timeline that needs to be strictly followed.

a chain of events that is predictable, and planned out really wouldn't be worth living through if we always knew the outcome after all.

Its something we really see in the hair industry, its renowned... 'oh ill go into hairdressing! ill have a career for life, and can adapt for family life', your family member would always say 'great choice, especially when you want to juggle work around kids!'.. that's not ok!

First of all don't degrade my career choice, second of all don't think I am choosing this work path just to factor my one day children in!

All I'm saying is, we can choose whatever path is presented, we can choose multiple! id rather loop the roundabout and see all exits over following the guided tour map any day!

be you- all the versions! Make mistakes, sometimes twice, love, experiment, achieve, and most of all live life to the fullest!

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